Today I went to a funeral. The 2nd Jewish service I’ve attended, first time in a temple. The 2nd time I’ve watched the same people I care about have to get up and give a eulogy. The first time it was for a father/grandfather and today was for a husband/father. The Jews definitely have that one on the Catholics – the eulogy – we really just started that at the last few funerals I’ve been too. Couldn’t imagine. Honestly. Couldn’t formulate words, I’m certain of it.

During the service I wouldn’t let myself think about being at my parents on Sunday and my mom waiting for my dad to go to bed before telling me as nonchalant as she could that my dad went in for heart tests this week and is on new medication. No blockage, just the top of his heart is weak. He’s going to be using it for a loooong time...what exactly does weak mean? They think it may be from the chemo – which was 18 years ago – it just never fully recovered from the treatments. They’ll regulate it with medicine and watch it. I’d prefer – there is another blockage and they’re going to take it out. Problem – solution. And his blood pressure fluctuates throughout the day, but I think some of it has to do with freaking himself out by watching it so much. No real mystery on him getting winded and blood pressure going up – he does more activity in a day than most people half his age do in a week. Now he’s on a schedule – cut the grass one day, weed eat the next...etc. We’ll see how long that goes. God help us if it starts cutting into his golf game.

Ok – I literally just got an email about someone else whose father passed away tonight. Children....watch your fathers.

It was strange being in the service today and not having anything to focus on visually. Usually no matter what church you’re in there is Jesus, on the cross, someone to pray to at the front of the room. A familiar face. Today, no Jesus. No cross. No ceiling painted with saints and stations of the cross. Just light. And peace. A colorful banner with a few Hebrew words and a beautiful wing-like pattern. And a room filled with a spirituality that didn’t need a focal point of the cross, it seemed to radiate out of the people, the believers in the room. Today everyone is a believer – at a funeral. You want to believe they are safe. They are at peace. They are...hmmm...not sure where they are when you’re Jewish, but I’ll just say they are in their heaven, which I hope is my heaven too – there are some Jews I really would like to have around for eternity.

As I listened to people speak about this man I’d only met once or twice, I felt a loss for not having known him better. My favorite line was when his daughter said he used to pick her up from school and would always ask...did you have fun today? I love that line. Not, do you have homework...not, when is soccer practice? And she said he was always telling her to live each day as though it was your last – literally saying those words to her on countless occasions. (She did remark how he went a little far to prove his point, as he was only 49 when he died.) How many people really say it out loud – making it their life philosophy instead of just words? Passing it on to their children as the norm instead of an incredibly brave and exceptional way to live by most people’s standards. I know a few, and they are very special people who make a profound impact on your life and would leave a definite loss when they go. The world needs more of those people. I’m reminded of the Gandhi quote – be the change you want to see in the world. I guess it could also said...be the fun you want to see in the world.

Did you have fun today?