Christmas Greeting from the house of dial up. Which means this will probably make no sense because i type faster than this computer thinks.

It's quiet. Peaceful. I'm wearing my smoking hot pink track suit santa brought me...separately it will be fine, but right now I kind of look like pink threw up on me. My nieces got these cool vests and scarfs....grown ups got work out wear....hmmmm...maybe Santa is trying to tell us something. I ran on the tread mill today...what more do you want Fat Man?

But let me back up to last night. Remember I said Trisha was going to call and we would open our gifts together? Sure enough she called and we all got on separate phones in the house. We both had our gifts in front of us...we called it on the matching pajamas, but this year they are a cute plaid...normal. So all of the sudden we both get to the bottom of the gifts and we yell...It's a Slanket!! And we are laughing so hard and my parents are cracking up too. Earlier in the night I was talking about my trip and instead of the tour highlights etc. random stories were sticking in my head. So i was talking about how for a week straight we were laughing about the slanket....Laurie and Trisha do a great reinactment of the infomercial...Trisha was doing it on the plane on the way home and Laurie was enlightening our new New Zealand friends...I'm trapped in my blanket! If only it had sleeves! So yes, the slanket is the blanket with sleeves. They were literally sold out when we went on their website when we were in Israel. But somehow my father thought this was the perfect gift for every woman in the family and ordered them off of TV or the internet. He was quite the actor, never letting on that i was sitting a mere few feet away from my own slanket as I went on an on. Which made me comment to him what a great actor he was and that in knowing this fact now was going to start doubting all my childhood memories. Only my family. I loved it. So last night i was wrapped in my slanket, wearing my new plaid pjs that are about 2 sizes too big and roasting because the fire place was kicking out a lot of heat, but I'll take a little heat to see the smiles on my parents' faces.

This morning we went to mass.
It was the first time in a long long time that i really felt connected to what was going on (or stepped foot in a church beyond my trip). A lot had to do with I was just where they were talking about. The life size manager in the front of church has a mural in the window of Jesus' view of Bethlehem and I said...that's really what it looks like. Sparse dome roofed buildings all made out of the same Jerusalem stone, fields where shepards kept their watch that night. Fear not. I remembered the feeling of being there - the place where He was born. Touching the stone of the ground where the manager had been sitting. It was like there was a current running through me all through the mass. It was there, in my mind's eye, in the cave/grotto where the shepards were, I was seeing the same sky, walking the same lands. And lo the Angel of the Lord came to them...today a baby was born in the City of David...we shall call Him Prince of Peace, Wonderer, Counselor. As we said the Our Father and I held my parents' hands I wondered if they felt the energy too...radiating through me. I wish they could. It was the type of experience that they say fills you up. Overwhelms you in the most wonderful of ways. I do believe. The baby, the Messiah, the life that He gave to save my own. It's been engrained in me since birth. It's a part of my family, my childhood, my education and my traditions.

I know that I'm a lot of times flippant on the subject of religion, but today I believed stronger than any other day. I was connected. I was a part of something much larger than myself and it felt amazing. I haven't gone off the deep end and become all born again, but today i remembered things about my religion that are pure and good and not political and messy and intolerable and featured on the 10 oclock news. And that gave me a certain peace. A baby is innocent and full of wonder and hope.

It's not about being Catholic, because politically and logistically I'm probably not even one any more. It's about believing in something. To me it's still the bigger spirtual picture and it's not just about the Baby J - it's all things in our world, in our life, in our belief system that help us to grow, to learn, to live and to love. To be not afraid, to have someone to talk to, to pray to, to ask for help and to give thanks to. As I've been learing in yoga (and you know i get freaked out when Jesus shows up there), it's about being in a moment. Experiencing and feeling. It's our individual spirtuality that guides us and gives us peace. Opening our hearts. Opening our minds. Thinking there is someone out there watching over you when you don't know what comes next and just letting go and letting be. It's hope. And it's beautiful.

We came home from church and my mom made breakfast.
My dad commented how good it was. She said, it was your Christmas gift. And he replied, consider my compliment yours. We laughed. And i couldn't imagine growing up in a home where your parents weren't silly and good hearted and in love even 50 years later. Then I fell asleep on the couch...sitting up....for 2 hours...I woke up when my mom was marveling at how i could sleep anywhere. Then I went for a run and the family showed up later this afternoon. It was great to see everyone - they all were talkative and got along well...which sometimes is a toss up on holidays. It's a bit easier when Trisha is not home because then I'm the only city dwelling freak. When it's both of us they feel it's all "us" against "them" I believe, which is all in their head...and sometimes she and I basically share a brain which I think also baffels them since the rest of us are so different. Jess did go on and on about shoes today so there is some common ground...haha. So great day with the family. Nathan arrived wearing a BatMan Dark Knight costume which apparently came with his new tennis shoes. I got to feed Baby Joey and was given the advice to sit somewhere I could prop my arm up because gets heavy. Heavy is an understatment....he's 6 mos and in 12 mos clothes. He's adorable as all get out with his dancing eyes and can't help but love him grin. It's fun to have kids in the house again. Jess, formerly the youngest will be 17 next month. Wow. The food was amazing...making a note to go running again tomorrow ;)

PS my dad just called me in the other room to watch the slanket commercial....this is a good Christmas. I hope yours was happy too.